A 5-Step Guide To Uncovering What You Want In Your Life & Business This Year

Today I want to ask you a question:

What do you want?

Do you know?

I’ve done lots of work around goal setting and how to know and create what you want. A lot of people are so turned off by the word 'goal', which is the first hurdle. But call it what you want; goal, aim, dream, wish, intention - whatever it is to you, I want you to think about what it is that you want, and get really clear about it.

Last Christmas, I went on a Desire Map retreat with the amazing Louise George, all about getting clarity on what you want by setting goals with soul, and understanding why you want something (most important piece).

Whilst there I discovered that I really wanted to buy a house. I'd known this for a while but it didn't feel 'good'. I wasn't excited by it, it just felt like something I ‘had’ to do. It was boring. And that's not cool, that's not the way to bring what you want into reality because there’s no good energy around that. It’s like wanting to ‘clear debt’ or ‘pay off a credit card’ - there's nothing that's going to excite you enough about that to do the work and actually make it happen.

Discussing it further with Anthony we realised that we didn't want a house. We actually wanted to live in an apartment. We wanted light, bright windows. We wanted it to be really cool - in a cool place with lots going on. Somewhere where I could have a nice workplace, be near to nature, with enough space to invite people round.

Lo and behold - I now find myself owning a beautiful apartment, with the large, bright  windows I wished for and personal workspace I adore.

I actually made it happen, but only once I'd got clear on what I actually wanted. The minute I had a clear idea of what I wanted, the universe conspired with me. The very next day we dropped interest in a house which didn't feel right, and started looking again. Straight away we discovered this very apartment I sit in now, which was due to complete the previous day with another owner but fell through. (Thanks Universe!) The whole buying process fell into place easily and everything just felt right.

It all happened by getting clear on what I wanted. There’s so much power in defining what exactly it is you want, it makes it so much easier to achieve, so I’ll ask you again,

If you’re in a place of uncertainty about what you desire for your life, here are a couple of simple steps to get you started:

  1. What don’t you want? And what do you want instead?

The first step to consciously creating a delicious life you want to slurp up with a spoon 🥄 is - getting clear on what that actually looks like, feels like, tastes like. Which I help my clients to truly, madly, deeply get to.
But if you’re struggling to even know what it actually is you want, rather than what you think you ‘should’ want, there’s a step before that too: Getting clear on what you DON’T want. Cos’ we can all do that eeeeasy peasy.
So write a list of all the things you don’t want. Yep, this is your permission slip to look at what’s gotta go. And then, ask yourself: what do you want instead? And write it down next to each ‘don’t want’ on your list.

2. What would you do if money were no object?

‘But money IS an object!’ I hear you cry. Here’s the thing, sometimes we get so blinded by the potential obstacles, that we forget how to dream at all. So just imagine for a moment that money wasn’t holding you back - get creative with your dreams. What would you do? Where would you go? What would you experience? By imagining outside of your current reality in this way, you’re able to really dig into what you actually want, and not what is or isn’t ‘realistic.’

3. What would you do if you weren’t afraid?

Another giant obstacle that holds us back from dreaming - fear. We often keep ourselves small, or don’t allow ourselves to dream, because our dreams can feel so SCARY. But, again, get creative with what you want. Put the fear out of your mind for a moment, and consider, if fear didn’t exist, what would you do?

When I ask this of my clients, they reply with ‘well if I wasn’t afraid, I’d x, x, x’ and reel off an entire list of exciting plans they’d take! Their faces light up and their voice lifts in joy as they explore the supersonic actions they’d take. And THAT’s where the drive comes from! The fears about how to get there - we can take control of those no problem. But only when we know what it is you really want to make possible (you know, if you weren’t afraid, obviously). ;)

4. Consider the practical side of your dreams, how much do they *actually* cost? What’s *actually* required?

Most of the time, we dismiss our dreams before we’ve already begun, because we can’t see ‘how’ to make them happen, or we ‘assume’ they’re impossible. I did this earlier this year with a beautiful car I’d had my eye on for a while. I’d never researched how much it cost, just always assumed it was out of my price range. I checked it out recently and realised it was exactly the same price as the car I’d thought was ‘more realistic.’ How’s that for dismissing my desires before I’d even fact checked? That creative venture, that trip around the world, those new wheels...whatever you’re wishing for right now, get the facts!

5. What *could* you do to bring you dreams to life?

Start brainstorming and getting creative with all the things you *could* do to bring your dreams to life. This is your chance to explore your options. And remember, this isn’t what you WILL do, or what you HAVE to do, only the things you COULD do. Again, this will help your brain to simply open up the possibilities and opportunities you have in front of you. It’s a chance for you to bring this to life for yourself. It’s a way for you to see it is actually possible, and really, to decide which path you’ll take to make it happen.

By exploring all options, even if they don’t feel realistic right now, you’ll start to see that you do have choices and plenty of resources and that it IS possible. It’ll just take some of your awesome resourcefulness - and you’ve got plenty of that!

So, how did your big dreaming go? What are you calling in this year? What do you secretly desire but have never allowed yourself to say it outloud before?

If you’d love some rock-solid support to uncover your desires, to find the unshakeable self-belief to own them with everything you’ve got, and to map out a strategic plan of action to bring them to life this year, head over HERE to book your place on the online masterclass: How To Crush The Can’t In Your Head.

Sophie FrenchComment